1. Either residual angular momentum or fat-bottomed girls make the world go round. Unclear if those are mutually exclusive.

2. Synchronicity.

3. The capitol of Djibouti is Djibouti. The King of Yerbouti is Sheik Yer Bouti.

4. Dick Cheney has a Segway.

5. V for Vendetta must really suck.

6. Backseat GM probably never got to the butter scene.

7. No good bars in Monterey. Go to nude beaches and bring your own.

8. Chinks have no ass hair and small penises (penii?).

9. Terrorists tried to blow up Gatorade with iPods and that's why the National Guard is policing all airports in California.

10. If a guy at work thinks you're gay and hits on you, grow a goatee and start working out.

11. Gay men have an inherent genetic interior designer sensibility and are therefore indispensable.

12. There's going to be a trade two weeks from Monday.

13. Fast cars and hot women are available in Danville late at night.

14. Buy the sound guy drinks.

15. Altamont said he's an idiot. Oddly, no debate ensued.

16. Someone needs to buy bluewire a Zagat's. Long John Silver's?

17. Big L. pisses on cars off the Bay Bridge late at night, and he moderates the behavior here.

18. This board needs more Gerbik.

19. All centaurs are hippogryphs.

20. Adonal Foyle sucks.

No wonder people think I'm educated.